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CYNTHIA ARMSTRONG

Get Unstuck and Help Your Child

By Cynthia Armstrong

What to do when we feel stuck and not sure how to help our child? Often, we work and we do something and we think that's what's gonna help her child or I just don't even have a clue what to do anymore. I've tried what I know. It hasn't worked. One of the things that happen is that our brain is negatively biased and so it takes on these patterns of negativity, and even when we're trying not to, it still can subconsciously happen. And then we feel stuck because we're focused on the things that are not happening with our child on what we want to happen. Build that improvement and behaviors, improvement in academics, independence, and being self-reliant and responsible.

Any of those things as parents, it's really easy to see those things that they're struggling with and when our brain latches onto that. I'll bring more of this into your life and so the biggest tip for when you're feeling stuck is to look for improvement as early childhood in kindergarten teacher when we work with those young ages, we learn how to not just, you know, make steps, but we make micro steps because especially when they come in, we just start having our first day of school today. And so I know that as I go into that first day with these kindergarten students, they're not sure because even if they've attended preschool, there's a huge difference in kindergarten, and we micro step everything like how to walk into the school, how to hang up our backpacks, or how to listen to the teacher. That's one of the first things that I talked about is we listen when the teacher is talking and so we teach all these micro steps and then it's not about, oh, did they listen when the teacher was talking.

It's about making those improvements and I've done this with my children, and my personal life, and it makes a huge difference because then it retrains my break. So I micro-stepped. But then it's not like they have to complete that micro step. It's not true or false, yes or no, it's the improvement that we're looking for to help our family be stronger how can we talk about how their behaviors can affect the family, and is that helping the family to be stronger? But we're also focused on individuals because if an individual has what they need, or they're able to show or develop their strengths that help our family be stronger and so there's this shift when we are instead of being focused on the stuff and all the things we're lacking or our child lacking, and that's creating that lacking us and we make that shift to you making improvements even.

The things that I am doing are affecting my child instead of making it more difficult for them rather than helping them to make easier improvements. Our focus is on those things that we don't have, those things that we didn't do instead of switching our brain to that positive, because all that continues down the path of negativity that just kind of comes naturally to our brain and doesn't benefit us or our family and so even when we make the tiniest improvement ourselves, we celebrate. Our brain will begin to create those new pathways that let us look for positivity for growth. Making those gains and then what is the focus on an improvement on games and then guess what's gonna come into our lives because our brain is looking for it and going towards that, those gains and improvement and will increase in those things that are so vital to make that switch to the improvement so that we're not stuck so that we can see the growth and the growth will happen even faster so remember that we have that privilege, that responsibility in raising these great kids.