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CYNTHIA ARMSTRONG

Habits That Help, Habits That Hinder

By Cynthia Armstrong

Hi today I want to talk about habits and noticing whether they help us or they enter us and it is so easy to pick up habits and we're not even aware of it.

Today I am talking about habits and it's really easy to pick up habits and we can pick up long-term habits, and we can pick up short-term habits or habits that we pick up pretty quickly. One example of this is when I was in school, so I was taking a special education class and we were simulating trying to communicate as one of our students with a disability and so to kind of pretend we had that disability to give us A at least a tiny bit of what if that was like they asked us to talk with our tongue pushed up against the from her mouth.

So I just kind of stuck my tongue up behind my back teeth and left it there. And then I was found like this so if you try that, you'll notice the sound that way. And then we did that for 15 minutes as part of this class and it was so difficult to communicate but what was so weird to me was just randomly throughout the day of a proven health, going like that and having to come back. I think of some of our students who have speech patterns that they've been practicing for years and it made me really consider how you can't just say, you shouldn't do it. Being aware of it certainly helps you to begin to notice and then to change. But some things we do, even speech patterns, not all, but some are habits that we picked up.

I want to look at my life. I asked you to consider in your life, what are some of the habits that you may have this one was just because of a class. We may have developed a habit to help us in one situation. And then found that we kept it and held on to it without realizing it.

Perhaps for a part of our lives we were overwhelmed with an extra situation and so we picked up some habits of how to talk to our children,kind of quick or short or rushed, because that was needed at that time.

But then, now that the situation has resolved or changed, maybe we're still being short and rushing. Just consider, I mean, there's so many possibilities of habits and what are the habits that we've looked up that are beneficial. So really look at those two because we want to strengthen those ones that are beneficial.

Have we picked up the habit? Pause before saying something grumpy to our kids. I do. We pause and say in our brains, like how much we love them before we start. Getting after them about something. Because guess what, we'll get after them in a different way. Do in a more kind and loving way if that is a habit that we have created for ourselves and then as we look at our children. When have they picked up habits? Maybe at the birth of a second child, when someone else was watching. Maybe when they were sick, they picked up some habits or some attitudes or some beliefs from when they were sick. And we can take a look at this for understanding, for helping them to shift or change or learn from some of the habits they have now.

And how can we tweet them to be beneficial habits and those beneficial habits we have, how can we solidify them? When we comment not in a way to make them self-conscious that, just in a casual way. How does that feel when you get your homework done all the time? You know how? How did that help you when you? You've got to school on time or when you got to bed on time. So when we do not say this is about you, but when we help them to consider or to think about it and how that was beneficial for them, like help them to feel. Will that really help our children to solidify beneficial habits and to see once that they might want to tweak and that we can help them tweak? So remember, children are great by their very natures. We have that privilege and that responsibility to raise them.