So what is it that we would rather have for our children? I know that choice is so important. Our children can use their internal guidance and agency; you could say to choose to do what is right and think about the difference. What is the difference between doing what is right and choosing to do what is right? There's a whole lot. And if we think about it, if our child can choose to do what's right, we've helped them to be independent. We've helped them create an internal sense of who they are and want to be on their own. Not what somebody is telling them they should be, not what the world is, but they're not doing it out of fear. They're not doing it because they want to get something from somebody else. They choose to do what is right because of who they choose to be. They are choosing to do these things that we might consider right because of who they are and who they choose to become.
They're making choices based on their moral compass rather than ours or the world, the person creating the fear, the obligation, or the bribe. You do this, and you get that. And how amazing is that? If we can do that for our child, allow them to develop that internal sense of right and wrong or what it is, you know, what it aligns with, who I am versus what aligns with. What I get or, you know, whether that's, you know, reduced fear, instead that's a bribe or love.
Sometimes we use love to control people, but that only works for so long, and that's not unconditional love. So. What would that be like for our children? Would that be like for us? Is that something we have? Do we have an internal compass that isn't based on fear, that isn't based on the world's perception that we want them to have of us? But is it true, based on what is aligned with ourselves? And if we have that. How would that be for our children to have that for them? This is something that, for me, is just amazing to think about. I remember when my children were little before I learned much of what I've learned. I was in a karate class.
My children were taking a karate class, and a new student was trying it out, and a mother asked their child to do something. And this was a younger sibling, maybe 18 months, that was there while her brother was taking the course, and the mother had asked her to sit on the couch. And there were a couple of teenagers next to her. And when Mom repeated herself, you know, sit, sit on the couch, then these teenagers just looked like they helped her help. This 18-year-old scooped her feet out from underneath her so she would sit on the couch. And I just remember that mother. Um, reaction? Not. I can't remember specifically what she said, but it was something along the lines I wanted my daughter to choose that for herself, you know, rather than have this physical help to be obedient. You see, I'm going to do it, or somebody's going to do it for me.
And I remember that kind of like when I first started. Um, really? Thinking more deeply because I'm sure it's something thought about, you know, what is it that I want for my children? I want my children to, you know, be obedient to do this right kind of thing. But what did that mean? I think that's when I first started looking more deeply into that and something that I've. Added to, you know, as I've learned and as I've grown and how I thought, what does that mean for me? Because if I can understand what it means for me and what it is that I want, then I can help my children to achieve that for themselves even more. So remember, children are great by their very natures, and we have the opportunity and that responsibility to raise them.
